I was born a replicate of my family’s thoughts and ideas.

It wasn’t until I moved out at 18 when I realized I was trapped in the mindset I was raised in.

Through living on my own the past few years, I came to realize the world is a rainbow of ideas and perceptions where the answer is never black and white. The combination of education and independence allowed me to absorb the world in my own experiences with my own beliefs.

I broke out of a Catholic upbringing and dependence on looking to God for all the good and bad things.

When I had questions about social issues, politics, morals and anything else a curious daughter and sister might ask- the answer was always set in stone as “that’s just how it is.”

To my utter amazement, that was not the case at all.

Even when I moved into an apartment as a fresh high school graduate, I had not moved away from the perspectives and morals I was always taught.

When I made my next move to Santa Barbara, a brand-new city after 19 years in San Jose, I stepped out of my comfort zone to break out of these confined thoughts.

I thought what I was raised to believe was the right way— the only way.

Friends and I would argue due to my stubborn mindset about social issues. I thought they simply didn’t understand, but in reality, my perceptions were stuck at a road block.

When some friends urged me to crash their philosophy class, I believed it was another attempt to get into social and political arguments for them to prove a point.

In all honesty, I had no idea what philosophy was even about. I was taught that it was something only “hippies” learned about.

It was mind-boggling how much learning I still had to do.

My friends stayed patient as I slowly started to open my mind to the insane possibility that everything in the world I was raised to believe in is a lie. A lie in the sense that nothing is ever what it seems and it’s up to us to look deeper.

The concept that we are trapped in a cave, unable to explore the outside of it and confined to one idea, perspective and story was how I felt I was living.

I am thankful for my upbringing and opportunities my family gave me, but I was lacking the crucial opportunity to discover life with my own experiences and not the ones told to me. I was told to fear the world and be cautious at every turn when in reality the fear only existed in me because it was placed there.

I’ve had a job since the day I turned 16, moved out when I was 18 and have been completely self-supported since then. Independence allowed me to develop my own thesis on life.

I became open to the social movements prominent in our country and values of other cultures including the fact that no person has a single story about them. There is always more than what you see.

I learned through education and taking new classes, especially philosophy, that you can constantly change your mind and fill it with new ideas and experiences.

I think that breaking away from old habits, closed people and negative thoughts is the best way to truly find yourself and allow life to throw anything at you with open arms and an open mind.

You are never too old and it is never too late to rediscover yourself and throw out what you were told.

I urge everyone, even my family, to attempt to do the same and place themselves in everyone else’s shoes as they’ll see that there is always something new to think about.

It’s so important to be able to understand other people from all walks of life and realize we can all learn from each other in some way.